Day 3: What are your top three pet peeves?
Rudeness: I can’t stand it when people are rude and/or inconsiderate. Or just outright assholes.
Exhibit A: Say please and thank you. It doesn’t hurt you. It doesn’t hurt anyone else. It doesn’t even take much time out of your day to say these simple words. If you can’t bring yourself to be polite, then don’t ask for any favors from me, thank you very much.
Exhibit B: Acknowledge that everyone is a person. I’ve spent a lot of years in the service industry in some capacity, and you know what happens to everyone, regardless of whether they’re a dishwasher or a district manager? They don’t get treated like human beings. I showed up to a friend’s baby shower once straight from work, in my Pizza Hut uniform, and her mother (who had met me several times) tried to shut the door in my face because she hadn’t even looked at me. “We didn’t order pizza,” she told me. And I wish I had a nickel for every time I’ve asked someone how they’re doing only to be told “I’m just looking.”
Exhibit C: Don’t deliberately be an asshole without reason. This includes driving, parking, walking, shopping, talking, booger disposal, you name it. Just be nice.
Exhibit D: Handle up on your responsibilities. Pick it up when your dog poops in my yard. Remove your child from the store when they’re throwing a screaming fit after you told them that you’d leave if they screamed again. Don’t drop someone else’s book in the bathtub and give back a waterlogged phonebook of a paperback, buy them a new one.
Hovering: Don’t stand, don’t stand so, don’t stand so close to me.
Exhibit A: Let me write. If I’m trying to write a story in the suspense genre for a contest, back off, please. I don’t write suspense, I don’t want to write suspense, but that was the luck of the draw.
Exhibit B: Let me poop. I need my bathroom time. I don’t even want to talk to you through the door.
Exhibit C: Let me cook. That’s just great that your mother doesn’t make it that way. I’m not her. I know what I’m doing, thanks.
Exhibit D: Let me watch. If you want to watch this show/movie/YouTube video with me, come around the couch and have a seat and please be quiet. Don’t lean on the back right behind me dropping potato chip flakes in my hair like chunky dandruff. Don’t tell the characters what to do. They can’t hear you.
Hypocrisy: Practice what you preach, brother. Don’t throw a fit when I do something that you do. I have far too many exhibits to list for this one. So I won’t.
What about you?