Today we went to the car graveyard, formally Central Storage.
Wednesday night, instead of bedtime, we all got dressed and picked up Ian’s brother to go to the hospital. Ian’s parents had gotten into a wreck, and we didn’t know how they were or what happened until we got there.
Their truck was totaled, but they’re okay. Ian’s dad is only bumped and bruised, but his mom suffered at least two broken ribs and a loss of consciousness. She’s home now, against medical advice, but at least she stayed one night in the hospital.
This was the first time Ian and I had seen or spoken to them since April 5th, when they came to court with Leah.
I know Ian’s dad was glad to see me; we’ve always gotten along. We were both shy, quiet, smartass people who liked to listen to loud classic rock in our blue S10s. The S10s are both gone now, but the rest is the same.
His mom and I used to be friends; we even worked together until she left the blood center. Things got worse between us when she found out about Leah’s pregnancy, and worse again when we finally got to see Abby. At first it was comments about how Abby would be such a great big sister. Those graduated into questions about Leah, because ‘she’s part of the family now.’ About a year ago, I started hiding in our bedroom for their weekly visits to see Abby.
During the time Leah wasn’t letting us see Abby, we found out Leah and Abby were spending time with Ian’s mom’s side of the family. We also learned that I didn’t want Ian to have anything to do with Abby, and that I was controlling Ian. Hm, good to know. By our best guess, it was also Ian’s mom who told Leah that I can’t have children.
Ian asked and asked that we sit down and talk, but he was put off and put off until the April court date, which cleared a lot up. Ian’s dad hasn’t been a willing participant; more a reluctant bystander.
When we got to the ER, I dropped Ian and his brother off to find something out while Abby and I went to park the car. Abby loved the grand adventure of traipsing hospital corridors after bedtime, and when we got inside, Ian’s brother took us to see his dad first. He was discharged a few minutes after we got there, so we all went to the other side to see Ian’s mom, where Ian already was.
Abby held her uncle’s hand, and they left me and granddad behind since the EMTs didn’t grab his cane from the wreck. By the time we made it to her room, she was exclaiming over how big and articulate Abby is. I hung back by the foot of her bed to see if I’d be acknowledged; but nothing until we were leaving, when I got a ‘thanks, April.’
As we left, Ian said when he first saw her, one of the things she said was about wanting to talk to us, and I got pissed. I’m so glad they’re both okay, but it’s because they’re okay that I’m pissed.
My mom has changed quite a bit since she got really sick; the ‘I know I’m going to die, so let’s get into heaven’ mentality. My mom has said and done some shitty things, but she has always rooted for the home team.
I feel like this accident was Ian’s mom’s ‘come to Jesus’ moment. That she saw her chance to see Abby again. That if we did have a nice, polite sitdown, it would be a round table of insincere pseudo-apologies, since she’s told Ian many times that she doesn’t need to apologize to me because she didn’t mean any harm.
I have hated this time for Ian’s sake. I feel that I’ve forced him to choose sides. I don’t want it to be that way. I would be fine with hiding because his mom doesn’t like me, as long as she shows Ian that she cares about him. Sure, it would be great if we could all get along again, but my trust has taken too big of a hit to just accept an apology without some action to back it up.
I can’t have a talk without me talking, and I’m afraid if I say what I need to say, I’ll only encourage more animosity towards us. I’m tired of biting my tongue instead of asking Leah why she made up so much for the counselor, but Ian’s mom can’t take Abby away, so maybe I can get some answers.