Office Bantering

“Have a seat, Barbara.” Mr Nichols gestured to the chair to the left of his desk. He waited patiently as she strode into his office and swept her skirt behind her knees as she took the proffered seat. “It’s come to my attention that some of your transactions are, shall we say, disputed.” He raised his left eyebrow and maintained eye contact.

In Barbara’s defense, she remained cool and collected. “If you’ll have a look at my history with this company, sir, I believe you’ll find a bit of poorly hidden contempt for me coming directly from accounting.” She was unable to raise a single eyebrow, so she pursed her lips the tiniest bit.

Mr Nichols leaned back in his leather chair and laced his fingers behind his head. “That’s where you’re absolutely correct, Barbara. I’ve already taken the liberty of reviewing the files we have on you from when you were a junior assistant, and I haven’t caught a single bounce or blooper. But if that’s so, why have these reports begun turning up on my desk, day after day?”

“Tactical espionage.” she answered, with the merest hint of a shrug. “I’m far from the first person to cope with such workplace persecution, and I certainly won’t be the last, even in this illustrious field. Correct me if I’m wrong, but when you took over as Vice President, you had a  tiff or two with Human Resources.” She smiled, believing this discussion to be over.

She was correct yet again. Mr Nichols laughed aloud, throwing his head back and holding his belly as he spewed forth joy. “You win again, Barb. I’m firing Steven by the end of the week. Keep up the good work.”


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