Tiger BloodPosted: February 2, 2012
…is what I have.
I feel fricking awesome.
But I’m getting ahead of myself.
At the counselor this morning, we discussed how I felt writing my list of wants. And I am so proud of myself for actually saying the first thing that came into my head, which was ‘silly.’ Of course, her next question was why I thought she would want me to feel silly. Also of course, my answer was because I’m too serious.
I know I take things too seriously. I know I worry about way too much. I just don’t know what to do about it. So my homework for this week is to relax. What a joke, right?
My husband and I talked about it this afternoon, and I tried to explain that it’s not good enough when he tells me not to worry, I need to know what specifically I don’t have to worry about. Down to things like, I don’t need to worry that he’ll get pissed and leave because I have to cut my jelly into squares at restaurants. You know those little tubs of jelly? I have to divide mine into fourths, and each half piece of toast gets a cube of jelly. Don’t judge me.
Anyway, I need specifics.
And now I’m lying in bed because the top of my skull wants to explode off my brain, but I feel amazing. I want to laugh and dance and sing! I’m taking that as a good sign.
Also, I have the best husband ever. He is out getting me frozen berries and cheddar cheese and cottage cheese (yum!) because he wants me to stay home and relax this weekend instead of riding with him at work. I have to admit, that does make me a little sad, but he did an excellent job defending his position, so I conceded. I think he worries about me too much. But he’s wonderful.
I’ll let you know if I figure out this whole ‘relaxing’ thing. I’ll probably write a lot to distract myself. Or finish my art project.